


Bad Ideas

by whoredan



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: AsaNoya - Freeform, Body swap fic, Karasuno, Light Swearing, M/M, asahi rises his voice @ noya kind of but it's not bad, azumome, boy/boy, dan and phil mention, no one asked for this, noya falls over a lot, some fluff at the end, volleyball homos
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-03
Updated: 2016-09-03
Packaged: 2018-08-12 16:45:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,892
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7941736
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/whoredan/pseuds/whoredan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>the body swap asanoya fic that no one asked for but i wrote anyway</p>
            </blockquote>





	Bad Ideas

**Author's Note:**

> i don't have a beta reader, pls excuse any typos lmao

How?

Why?

Asahi put a hand to his face, which really wasn’t his face.

It was Nishinoya’s.

*1 day earlier*

“Well, I found this mystic called Caroline-”

“Phi… Phil, you found a crazy cat lady called Caroline-”

“Hey, Asahi-san! I wonder if there are things like this for 500 yen instead?” Nishinoya had called from his room.

“Things like what?” Asahi says, poking his head through the door to Noya’s room.

“Like, little digital things people do for you for 5 dollars. But with 500 yen instead of dollars.”

“Uh, probably?” Asahi raises an eyebrow. “Google it.”

Noya grins, excited, and opens up the search engine to look it up.

“Well, don’t just stand there! You’re participating too.”

Asahi walked over to Yuu and his computer, secretly excited about what they would find. Leaning over his shoulder with his hands in his pockets, he watched Noya type in the words “digital things for 500 yen.”

“Digital things?” Asahi questioned.

“Well, do you have a better explanation?”

“The explanation you gave me, Noya,” Asahi sighs, removing his hands from his pockets to reach around Nishinoya and replace the word things with services and hit enter.

The first thing that popped up was someone claiming to be a witch, who promised to cast a charm or curse on any amount of people.

Noya clicked on it.

“N-noya, aren’t you gonna look around more? What if this just turns out to be fake? Or what if it’s real and you end up with seven arms or something?” Asahi said nervously, biting at a nail.

“Well then either I lose 500 yen, which isn’t too bad, or I’m better at receiving,” Yuu said confidently, scrolling through the list of charms. “Besides, it’s probably fake anyway.”

One of the options caught Noya’s eye, and he laughed.

“A body swap? Wow, that could not be more fake,” he continues laughing, then clicks on it.

“Oh my god, you’re gonna choose that?” Asahi moves his hand away from him mouth only to place it over his forehead.

“What’s the worst that could happen, Asahi?” Noya grins up at him.

“We could actually get swapped.” Asahi says.

“Oh, don’t be such a scaredy-cat! It most likely fake, anyway, I just want to see what they ask from us.”

Asahi sighs. “Fine. But if we get swapped, I…” Asahi tries to think of how to finish that sentence and fails.

Noya laughs and looks at the form.

“So she needs our full names and country. Hm,” he says, typing Nishinoya Yuu/Japan in one form and Asahi Azumane/Japan in the other.

“You could get kidnapped by giving out that information, Noya!” Asahi exclaims.

“What, and you couldn’t? It’s alright, Asahi,” he says, jabbing him in the stomach.

Before Asahi could protest further, Noya hit enter on the forms and they were sent.

Thank you! Effects will take place in 12 hours at the most.

Asahi sighs again. “Oh my god.”

“12 hours? Ugh, what are we gonna do until then?”

“Don’t you still have some board games in the closet?” Asahi suggests.

Noya thinks. “Yeah, I think.”  
Nishinoya won every game but one, mostly because Asahi had let him win.

\--- 

Asahi woke up in Noya’s room, which wasn’t too odd in of itself. The two frequently stayed the night at each other’s houses.

But what was weird was that when he flung his legs over the side of the bed, they were… smaller? And thinner.

Asahi widened his eyes. “What the hell?” 

He steps onto the floor and quickly becomes confused. Why is his desk shelf out of his reach? What is this shade of yellow blocking his vision? What?

He makes his way over to the bathroom and looks in the mirror, having to stand on his tip toes. And what he sees is possibly one of the most shocking things.

How?

Why?

Asahi put a hand to his face, which really wasn’t his face.

It was Nishinoya’s.

\---

Nishinoya woke up in a different house.

After rubbing his eyes and brushing hair out of his face, he looks around and recognizes the room as Asahi’s. But… Why was he there? He didn’t remember going to his house before going to sleep. 

He shrugs and hops off of the bed, causing him to fall towards the floor. He puts his hands out to stop the fall, when he notices the hands are… bigger? His arms have got way too much hair, as well.

Noya pulls himself up off the floor and almost falls over again. The blood hadn’t had enough time to reach his head, which he would’ve found strange except for the fact that he was eye level with the top of the closet door.

Noya stumbles into the bathroom, having to bend down to look in the mirror, and he gasps.

The face that looks back at him, wearing a shocked expression not unlike his own(or… not his own?), was Asahi’s.

\---

Asahi scrambles back into his bedroom, searching the nightstand for Noya’s phone. When he finds out, he unlocks it easily(4444? Really?) and immediately goes into contacts, searching for his name. He doesn’t find his name specifically, but assumes that the contact called “Ace” with a bunch of kaomoji is his. He opens up the contact and selects “Send Message,” quickly typing,

Me: Noya. What the heck.

Ace (*´∇｀)ﾉ: ASAHIWHATTHEFUCK

Me: i TOLD you something would happen!

Ace (*´∇｀)ﾉ: OK YES YOU CAN HAVE YOUR I TOLD YOU SO MOMENT LATEr WHAT THE HELL ARE WE GOING TO DO

Me: I don’t know, but I’m on my way over.

Ace (*´∇｀)ﾉ: OK SEE YOU

\---

When Asahi arrived at Noya’s- wait, no, HIS house, he frantically pressed the doorbell until someone answered.

His mother answered.

“Oh, Yuu! It’s wonderful to see you, how was last night?”

“It was nice, Oka-” he coughed, “Asahi-san.”

“Come in! Azumane is up in his room,” his mother smiled warmly.

“Thank you!” Asahi said, rushing up to his room and opening the door.

“Noya, oh my god.”

“Okay, yes, I shouldn’t have chosen a fucking body swap,” he says.

“Please don’t swear, it sounds so weird coming out of my mouth.”

“How are we going to go to school like this? I can barely pilot your body, you’re so tall!”

“We have to, though, people would be suspicious if we both suddenly stayed home for however long we’re like this,” Asahi worries the inside of his -Noya’s?- cheek.

“Okay, fine, but step out for a second, I need to change into whatever you usually wear.”

“It’s my body you’re in, but if you insist,” he shrugs, walking out of the room and closing the door before realizing.

“Do not change the underwear, Noya.” He calls back through the door.

Yuu laughs. “Don’t worry, Asahi.”

He steps out a minute later wearing that off-white sweater with a button up underneath, and plain pants.

“Oh thank god, I thought you were going to come out with something completely different.”

Noya laughs. “I think I know how you dress by now.”

As they’re making their way to school, Noya stops.

“Wait, your-my-your-agh, I don’t know! Hair. It isn’t up like I usually have it.”

Asahi’s face slackens. “Oh. Yeah, that. It should be fine, I can just say you ran out of gel or something.”

“The amount of shit I’m-You’re- gonna get from Tanaka is gonna make you regret that, but… Alright,” Noya sighs.

“Wait, h-how are we even going to make this believable? I mean, we can’t just say, ‘Oh, we swapped bodies and don’t know how to get back, surprise!’” Asahi says, worried.

Noya shrugs. “It shouldn’t be that hard, all we have to do is act the complete opposite of how we are usually, right?”

Asahi sighs. “I… I guess.”

When they finally get to school, Noya instinctively jumps up to touch the top of the doorframe, but ends up running face first into it instead, falling down.

“Oh my god, are you okay?” Asahi exclaims,covering his mouth.

“Forgot that I’m not short,” he groans.

Asahi facepalms. This was going to be a long day. 

\---

Classes went okay. The two had to repeatedly go over the other’s schedules in their minds, but they managed to memorize them before the bell rang.

Asahi had no trouble in the classes, seeing as he had already learned all of this, but Noya may have struggled a bit. One of the teachers had asked him if he was feeling well and even sent him to the nurse, but at the end of the day, everything was fine.

Until they remembered volleyball.

“Wait. Oh my god. Asahi. Asahi,” Noya had stopped suddenly. “I can’t spike, Asahi.” 

Asahi suddenly realizes what he’s talking about. “Oh. Oh, shit.”

“And you said you don’t swear.”

“Not the time! How are we gonna play like this?”

“Uh… We could switch positions for today?” Noya suggests.

“That would be odd if you suddenly knew all about how to spike and I was an amazing receiver.”

Noya pauses the worry to grin. “Asahi thinks I’m an amazing re-cei-verr~” he sings.

“Who doesn’t, Noya?” 

“Not the poi-nt!” he continues singing.

“Nishinoya Yuu!” Asahi says sternly.

“Okay, mom. What do you think we should do?” Noya goes back to being worried quite quickly after the initial shock of Asahi’s voice raising.

“I don’t know!” He says, his voice returning to its original volume.

“I guess we could just say that we aren’t feeling well?” Noya says, shrugging.

Asahi sighs. “That seems like our only option. Let’s just hope Daichi will let us sit out for today.”

They ask Daichi if the two of them could stay on the bench for today, and while he’s suspicious, he shrugs and lets them, anyway. Noya and Asahi make their way to the bench. And suddenly, they actually aren’t feeling well.

A sharp pain flares in each of their stomachs, as if something’s trying to escape. They resist the urge to double over in pain, but they do resort to clutching their stomachs. 

Asahi gasps as his vision goes black for just a moment, and then the pain is gone, and he’s not in the same part of the bench as he was before. He looks over to his left and sees Noya(in his own body) and almost screams.

They’re back?

They have to keep from celebrating until practice is over, but the minute they’re out of sight from everyone else(or so they think), they turn to each other.

Noya jumps towards Asahi, and Asahi is forced to catch him with a grunt and a loud “Woah!”, but he doesn’t really mind, he’s just happy that he doesn’t have to strain his neck looking up anymore.

“We’re back!”

“I know!”

Asahi holds on to Noya to keep him from falling and places a quick kiss on the top of his head.

Neither of them are flustered about it.

“Wow, I think that’s the gayest thing I’ve seen from you so far,” Tanaka says from behind them.

Noya laughs, resting his chin on the top of Asahi’s head and grinning. “Eavesdropper alert,” he jokes.

And again, the two boys just can’t find it in themselves to care, because oh my god, they’re back, and Noya promises in his head to never doubt any internet mystics ever again.

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading, comments and kudos are appreciated :)))


End file.
